Dear Editor,

Take me off your list immediately.

Debbie and Larry Smith

Dear Debbie and/or Larry,

We don't have a "list". But please take me off of your list, because I don't know you and I gotta tell ya, you're starting to scare me.

Let me guess... didn't check out our site? Our site allows readers to forward pages to their friends, namely you. If it was recommended in error or that person is not real, I genuinely apologize. Rest assured the conspiracy has not sold me your email address. They know you have passion to fight an institution the size of spam and junk mail combined... you do fight junk mail don't you? How did you think we got your email address and why would we want it? We don't even sell products. Bet ya didn't know that either, huh?

I DO NOT RECOMMEND www.glossynews.com to you(s)! It is enjoyed by only the most intellectual of reader and it is not for the faint of heart. Yes, we discuss prostitution, yes we have photos of Bob Dole smacking ass, and yes, we did run a picture of Arafat on three hits of e-bomb (I think they were Purple Bees or something, they were good though).

This is news man! You're off the list! I don't have one but if I did, forget it, forget you! You're off it! No news for Debbie or Larry Smith! You guys have to get your reports from a hack outfit like that CNN or those jokers over at MSNBC. Hey, if that's what you want, go for it, but we're the only game in the world who has post-mortum photos of Gotti with St. Peter. We're the only ones covering the How to be a Pimp Seminars, and when the story breaks on the illegal persecution of Canadian Geese, the deportation of the orphaned orca whale or Playboy's upcoming "Women of Al Quiada" you're going to be in the dark buddy, because WE are in the know and we got what it takes... whatchoo got?

Your Pal,

the Editor*

PS In the future, don't write back to spam mail. Companies of ill repute will use that information to verify you are real so they can sell your name, and those who you irritate will sign you up to porno sites like crazy. There's no laws against it ya know, this isn't snail mail. You have to be more careful. Consider instead using a "block" feature which should be free.

* Did I mention award winning? Yeah, well that.

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